What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
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