Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
