When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
