You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
