wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Sorry about my life...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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