And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
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