it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
