But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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