Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Randomize
