I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
When did angry sex become our thing?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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