Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
organizing the empties. That sober.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
