i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
