We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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