Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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