Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
