Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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