i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
