My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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