after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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