did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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