He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I love you. Go after that dick
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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