are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
