Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
