I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
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