she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
