(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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