Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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