6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
