The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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