Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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