i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
