I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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