Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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