Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize