She's JV to your varsity
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
