Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
there is puke in my bra ... again
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
