we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
