That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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