remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize