so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
