I got chris browned last night
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
