We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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