At least make sure they are 18
Why
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
