help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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