What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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