Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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