If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
