Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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