He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
foreskin is a definite game changer
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
