Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
She announced her abortion via fbk
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
