Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
you had me at cake vodka
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?