that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
